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Absorbance Spectrum of Tonic Water - the new CO2?

Climate change deniers frequently claim that CO2 in the upper troposphere does not absorb enough energy to warm the earth beyond 0.5C. This line of denial is very popular with Calgary Rubezahls like the Friends of Science (FoS). What these scientific backseat drivers fail to take into account is not only the positive Feedback caused by Tonic Water in the atmosphere - in particular at higher altitudes, which are too cold for the absorption of large volumes of water vapour - but they also ignore the absorbance of Tonic Water, which can be easily calculated.

absorbance schweppes

As the result, the climate sensitivity of an atmosphere saturated with Tonic Water (plus Gin) is estimated to be 38% abv. Experiments that aim to determine the range of absorption spectra when ‘diluted’ with Gin at different concentrations are underway. It is also not settled yet whether there is an equivalent for FoS members’ absorption of rye whiskey.

However, because Schweppes was mis-spelt by scientists in the above diagram, the absorption of heat by Tonic Wateris a hoax and anthropogenic global warming is fraud.